It’s Not All About You: How the Internet is Like a Bad Indie Film

So, a few nights ago I was watching this indie movie called Multiple Sarcasms. You may not have heard of it, and I wouldn’t blame you. It’s one of those films that sat on the shelf for a few years before getting a very limited release and then finally finding its way to DVD. I probably wouldn’t even talk about this movie at all, except that it brings me to a larger point that I will eventually get to, I promise. I watch a lot of movies, obviously, and sometimes I’ll give something a chance just because I like the actors in it, even if it doesn’t sound like something I would normally enjoy. The cast here is full of actors I really like – Timothy Hutton, Mira Sorvino, Dana Delany, Stockard Channing, even Mario Van Peebles! So I gave it a shot.

It’s a pretty awful movie, not because the acting is bad (it isn’t) or it’s technically incompetent (it’s not) – it’s a bad movie simply because we’re given no reason to care about the lead character and his plight (or lack thereof). Hutton’s character is a guy who basically has it all – a beautiful wife (Delany), a hot and funny best friend (Sorvino), a great daughter, a solid and well-paying career as an architect. People would kill to have this man’s life. But he’s not happy. Why? No particular reason. He’s not happy because he’s a navel-gazing douche who can’t appreciate how good he has it. If he were suffering from a mental illness or some sort of disease, maybe we would understand why he would want to re-evaluate and shake up his life. But no, he’s just a dumbass who is so discontented that he has to write a play about how bored with life he is, as if anyone wants to see that. The play is called Multiple Sarcasms, and is even more annoying than the movie. Oh, and for some reason the story is set in 1979, which gives Hutton the opportunity to go to multiple screenings of Starting Over. Which only makes us wish we were watching that too.

So the big question here is, who fucking cares?? This isn’t a movie - it’s a pity party on film for a guy who doesn’t need or deserve one. It’s not funny, entertaining or interesting in any way. It does tell a story, just not one that holds any interest for anyone who wasn’t involved in the making of the film. I’m just guessing here, but I would wager that writer-director Brooks Branch (the most unlikely name for a filmmaker ever) based this on his own personal life. Otherwise, why even tell this story in the first place? And hey, good for him – he got his movie made. I just don’t understand why he thought anyone else would want to watch it. This is an epidemic that seems to have invaded indie film lately – the idea that a story doesn’t have to actually be interesting to be worth putting on film. The whole “mumblecore” movement has perpetuated the notion that you can just put anything you want on the screen, no matter how boring or rambling or self-involved, and not only will people watch it, they should watch it. I strongly disagree. The audience needs a reason to care. If you don’t give them that, they have no reason to watch your film. Period.

I’m not here to dump on indie film in general – I happen to love indie film. Many of my favorite films are indies. I have total respect for anyone who can get their film made and shown in what amounts to a very limited market. That’s why I give movies like Multiple Sarcasms a chance. I just think it’s reached a point where a lot of indie film (not all) is just self-absorbed nonsense passing as “Important Art”, and that makes me sad as an audience member. I remember when indie film was vital and exciting and brilliant, when new voices were being heard and they were making the kinds of movies Hollywood wouldn’t touch. And yes, there are still indie films like that being made. But mostly what’s on the screen these days is a bunch of annoying hipsters whining about their relationships. Who cares? I’m at the point where I’d rather watch Jason Statham punch people in the face. At least there’s something actually happening in those movies.

Here’s a tip, indie filmmakers: just because something happened to YOU doesn’t mean it’s interesting to watch. I wouldn’t put my life story on film and expect people to watch it – why would you? Tell us a story. Show us something interesting. Make us laugh, cry and feel something. Put a little effort into it. I know a lot of indie filmmakers worship Woody Allen (and rightfully so), but they don’t seem to learn anything from his work. Woody Allen’s films (generally) are funny and entertaining, with fascinating characters and inventive stories, extremely witty dialogue, excellent acting, and best of all, they’re actually about something. If you’re going to emulate Woody, emulate those aspects. If you think you have something to say, say it in an entertaining way. Don’t just bash the audience over the head – sneak up on them and make them think when they’re not expecting it. Honestly, satirical films like Paul Verhoeven’s RoboCop and Joe Dante’s Gremlins 2 have changed more minds than a million sad, serious slogs. If you want to make a point, entertain the audience first. Don’t just bitch and whine for 80 minutes. And really, no one cares about your breakup, your divorce or your gay experiment in college. Unless there’s a really interesting story to tell (and you’ve told that story to at least 2 other people who found it fascinating), keep it to yourselves.

But after suffering through Multiple Sarcasms, I couldn’t help but think that maybe in some strange way, it actually is reflective of our self-absorbed culture. Thanks to the internet, we live in a time when everyone seems to think their opinion is the only one that’s valid and their story is the only one worth telling. Bad news, folks – no one cares what you think. Seriously. I know that sounds odd coming from someone who writes a blog, granted. But I only write when I feel I really have something to say that no one else is saying. It’s not about boosting my ego or tearing other people down. If it sometimes comes off that way, it’s not my intention. I generally write to celebrate the things that I love (this post being the exception, obviously), not to spout hate. But too many people online just seem to talk just to hear themselves talk – whether the subject is politics, religion, gender issues or even movies, it’s all just an excuse to spout off. Very few message board or talkback commenters seem to ask themselves whether they’re saying something worth hearing. I don’t understand the need to start arguments all the time, or to push people’s buttons for the sake of it. What’s the point? I’m not trying to discourage genuine debate – I’m saying we don’t have to debate every fucking thing, all the fucking time. We believe what we believe, and that’s not going to change. Pissing people off for no reason just makes your side seem like the bigger assholes. And no one feels the need to actually back up their opinions with facts or even knowledge – it’s as if just because you think something, that makes it true in the actual world.That’s not the way it works! If your opinions are ill-informed, why should anyone want to read them, much less respond to them? You’re just wasting your time and ours.

It just amazes me that it never seems to occur to people that maybe, just maybe, they’re not the only person in the world and that maybe their opinions are just that – opinions. Opinions are not facts. Never have been, never will be. You can argue about stuff until the end of time, and it’s not going to change a damn thing. So why bother? Why not think before you write or post something, “does anyone really care? Is this interesting to anyone? Am I just talking to hear myself talk, or do I actually have something to say worth hearing?” I ask myself those questions before every post here – and there have been times I haven’t written things I was thinking about because I just don’t think it’s interesting enough to put up for public consumption. Sometimes I think the best thing is to keep it to myself, and I wish more people would think that way. That’s how you wind up with movies like Multiple Sarcasms, and that’s how you wind up with an internet full of pissed-off people arguing over nothing. ENOUGH ALREADY. It’s just fucking boring.

And yes, all of this is just my opinion. Which you can take or leave as you choose. And have a nice day.

My Awesome Movie Weekend: Cabin, Lockout and The Raid Get the Party Started

Not that I’m entirely surprised, but I find it sad that all the talk online today is about how this weekend’s “newcomers” couldn’t beat Hunger Games at the boxoffice. I for one never expected them to – clearly Hunger Games is a phenomenon that’s going to last for awhile (at least until the summer movie season starts). What’s disappointing is that no one seems to be talking about the movies themselves – it’s as if their value is suddenly diminished because they didn’t claim the #1 spot. Yeah, I know, what else is new, right?

I’m particularly disappointed by this reductive talk because I for one had an absolute blast at the movies this weekend. This was one of those rare weekends where the stars aligned (or something) and several movies that I wanted to see badly actually opened in theaters nationwide. Now, when I was younger, we used to have weekends like that all the time. It used to be that we couldn’t even keep up with all of the damn movies we wanted to see in theaters (particularly in the 80′s, when there was a boom of genre films) and there was good new product out every single week. We relied on video and cable just to catch up with theatrical releases, not because the movies we wanted to see were often in very limited release or sent straight to home viewing. These days, however, I will sometimes go weeks at a time without going to the theater because there’s simply nothing there that I find worth my time. And when I do go to the theater, it’s usually to see one particular film that weekend, not two or even three.

Since I’m always complaining about the lack of decent fare at the local multiplex, I thought I should celebrate the fact that there are three very good, original (not remakes or sequels or based on children’s books) movies currently playing nationwide right now. I’m sure most of you already know this, of course – but I think it’s worth pointing out anyway. This is an excellent time to go to the movies and prove to the studios and theater chains that you want to see quality original genre movies. Whether you like horror, sci-fi, action or some combination of the above, you can’t go wrong with any of these three films. I’m not going to write full reviews or post spoilers here (mainly because you should see them for yourselves) – I just want to discuss these films a little bit and tell you why you shouldn’t wait for Netflix or Redbox or even cable to see them.

I think most horror fans already are aware of Cabin in the Woods by now, at least those who read online reviews and pay attention to movie news. The history of the film is a relatively complicated one – it was one of the movies made by MGM before they went bankrupt a couple of years ago, and it was stuck in limbo for what seemed like forever until Lionsgate finally picked it up last year. Most movies that sit on the shelf for that long eventually find their way to “straight-to-video purgatory” and some just don’t get released at all (hey LG, any chance you might pick up All the Boys Love Mandy Lane?), but Lionsgate clearly recognized its quality and saw fit to give it that long-awaited theatrical release. Kudos to them, because Cabin absolutely lives up to the hype. I don’t even want to get into the plot or the satirical commentary on what Roger Ebert calls “Dead Teenager Movies” – just know that if you’re any kind of horror fan, even a casual one, this is a movie you should see as soon as humanly possible. Director/co-writer Drew Goddard and producer/co-writer Joss Whedon have come up with the kind of game-changer that will make you wonder, “why didn’t anyone think of this before?” Unlike most long-delayed films, Cabin doesn’t have that “five minutes ago” feel to it – it absolutely feels like right fucking now in the best possible ways. I’m sure some horror fans will find it too “meta” for their taste and the inevitable backlash will ensue. I don’t really care, and neither should you. Cabin in the Woods is just too damn good to pass up.

Similarly, the Luc Besson production Lockout won’t be for everybody – just for those who appreciate a good cheesy slice of 80′s-style sci-fi/action. It’s basically Escape From New York, Die Hard and Fortress thrown in a big crazy blender, and if its derivative nature bothers you, you probably won’t be susceptible to its B-plus movie charms. But if you’re like me and your reaction to the trailer was “I think I’m in love with that movie”, then you don’t need me to convince you. I wouldn’t say it’s the greatest movie ever made, but it is a lot of old-school crazy fun. If you’re going to steal, steal from the best, right?

Then there’s the Indonesian action film The Raid, which has been in limited release for a few weeks now but Sony Classics has expanded to 881 theaters nationwide. Thank you, Sony Classics! The online hype for this has been massive, and I’m thrilled to report that if it’s action you want, The Raid definitely delivers. Director Gareth Evans and star Iko Uwais are clearly the next big thing in action films, and this relatively simple story of a police unit taking down a drug lord’s apartment building turns into sheer eye-popping insanity. If it’s plot and character development you want, this isn’t the movie for you. If, however, you want to see awesome non-stop action performed by skilled stuntmen without shaky-cam, ADD editing or CGI, The Raid is your movie. It’s a bracing reminder of how action films should be done. Some critics have asked what the point is – well, the point is to place the audience right in the middle of an intense and brutal situation, and the result is an incredible cinematic experience. If that’s not what you want a movie to be, well, can’t help you there. But action fans will enjoy the hell out of it. I can’t wait to see what Evans does next.

So, there you have it. You can’t go wrong with any of these films. As far as I’m concerned, this has been one of those weekends that film fans dream of, and if you missed it, you can still catch up! For once the place to be isn’t a film festival or a movie marathon but your local cineplex, and I sincerely hope you all enjoy it. Weekends like this are pretty rare now, but we should appreciate them when they do come around. Have fun, and I’ll talk to you later.

Kid, You’re an Old Man Now

Have you ever had a moment when you realize you’re getting older and not as in tune with pop culture as you thought you were? I’m having that moment right now as The Hunger Games is devouring the boxoffice. For the record, I’m 42 years old, but I’m apparently 112 when it comes to the zeitgeist. I’ve always prided myself on being relatively hip for my age, but now I realize that I have no clue what “the kids” are into these days. And that’s a bit of a shock.

In all honesty, the first time I had ever heard of The Hunger Games was when Lionsgate announced they were making a movie of The Hunger Games. Before that, it had never even hit my radar screen. I quickly learned that it was based on a “tween” book, and my reaction was mostly to shrug. I had no idea that every 13-year-old in America has apparently read this fucking thing. The whole phenomenon surrounding this completely passed me by, much like “mumblecore” and “dubstep”. Yes, I’ve reached the point where I’m apparently the last person on Earth to hear about the latest trends. When film bloggers predicted that The Hunger Games was going to be as huge as Harry Potter or Twilight, I admit that I scoffed. “No one over 15 has even heard of that.” I guess that doesn’t really matter any more, does it? Yep, I’m fucking old.

Now, I’m not passing judgment on The Hunger Games. I haven’t seen the film, nor have I read the book. I’m always glad when today’s kids are motivated to go to the movies, and at least it’s not a fucking remake or a toy commercial. I just don’t have any particular interest in seeing it myself. Which surprises me, because there’s nothing about the film itself that should inherently turn me off to it. I like director Gary Ross (whose Pleasantville is one of the most underappreciated films of the 90′s), and the cast is full of actors whose work I enjoy. The reviews I’ve read have been uniformly positive. I just don’t feel like this is my thing. I’m not motivated to go sit in an audience full of tweens and watch this like a creepy old man. Even in my thirties, that’s not something that would have bothered me. I would have just gone to see it. Now I would feel weird about it. I’m sure there are some adults who are seeing it, just as many adults without kids went to see the Harry Potter films. But I don’t feel like it’s a film for me. I will probably see it at some point, either on DVD or Netflix streaming or something like that. But the idea of actually going to a theater and paying to see this just doesn’t appeal to me, any more than seeing Alvin and the Chipmunks 3 would appeal to me. And yes, that makes me feel very old.

I’m guessing that probably a lot of film fans in my age group feel like this right now. Remember when we used to know about stuff that was going on? Yeah, that’s over now. Looking over the schedule of upcoming films, I feel a certain familiarity with most of what is being released this year. I know who The Avengers are. I know what The Hobbit is. I know Prometheus is a prequel to Alien (or is it?) and Total Recall is a remake of Paul Verhoeven’s film. I know about Batman and Spider-Man and Dark Shadows and James Bond. Even Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter is based on a book that I’ve heard of. Nothing really jumps out at me as being outside my comfort zone. There are so many new films that I’m dying to see, like Tarantino’s Django Unchained, Alfonso Cuaron’s Gravity and David Cronenberg’s Cosmopolis. I feel like I still keep up pretty well. But for some reason, when it comes to something like Hunger Games, I guess I just have a blind spot. Maybe this marks a turning point – maybe in the future I won’t have a clue about what’s going on in the film world or why they’re making the movies they make. I’m already baffled by movies like Transformers and GI Joe. I don’t really get why people go to see that stuff. Maybe that’s just how it’s going to be from now on – “those young whippersnappers and their crazy CGI robot movies! In my day, we had to watch real actors, and we liked it!” But I sincerely hope not.

I will say that when I read the description of The Hunger Games, it reminded me quite a bit of Battle Royale. I know that’s an easy comparison to make, and I’m hardly the first person to make it. Both movies are about a big competition in which teenagers are forced to kill each other to try to survive (not that Lionsgate’s trailers and TV ads actually emphasize the whole “kids killing kids” aspect). But where Kinji Fukasaku’s 2001 Japanese film couldn’t even score a limited theatrical release in post-Columbine America, somehow a major Hollywood film with the same basic idea is a huge phenomenon. Doesn’t that give anyone pause? I’m amazed there hasn’t been any outrage from the hysterical parents’ groups over this. Wasn’t there a school shooting like a month ago? Hellooooo, McFly? You mean nobody’s going to suggest that impressionable teenagers might be influenced by this film to commit horrible acts of murder? No one’s going to be irrational about this, like they have for so many other films involving teenagers? Really? No one?

Wow… I guess the world really did change when I wasn’t looking. Awesome.

The Annual Harvey Weinstein Ass-Kissing Party, aka The Oscars

You know, I was all prepared to write a long rant about last night’s Oscars, but I realize now that I really don’t care enough to get worked up about it. Does it really matter? Every year Harvey Weinstein picks some film to push on the Academy, and every year they buy into it, whether the film is worthy or not. That’s basically what it’s become now. I really believe that most of the voters are thinking, “you know what, might as well vote for The Artist, because Harvey Weinstein is behind it and it’s going to win anyway.” Might as well jump on the bandwagon. I don’t even hate The Artist; I thought it was a perfectly decent gimmick comedy, and that’s about all. It’s like giving an Oscar to Mel Brooks for Silent Movie. I think the director and cast are very talented people, and I have nothing but respect for them (and seriously, check out their OSS 117 spy-movie parodies; they’re hysterical). But where Scorsese used modern technology to make Hugo an immersive cinematic experience, The Artist is the visual equivalent of an old RCA Victrola. Yes, let’s go backwards rather than forwards, that’s always a great idea. Let’s celebrate the balls it must have taken to make a film without color and sound! Give me a break.

So let me just ask you this simple question: how many of last night’s winners actually deserved it? Does anybody really think The Artist is the Best Film of 2011? Does anyone really believe that Michel Haznavicious is a better director than Scorsese, Spielberg, Allen and Malick? Does anyone really believe that Jean Dujardin is a better actor than Demain Bichir, George Clooney, Gary Oldman and Brad Pitt, or that he even gave a better performance than any of theirs? Did anyone on Earth even like The Iron Lady?? If you can answer “yes” to any of those questions without laughing, then you must know something I clearly don’t.

Honestly, what a giant fucking joke the Oscars has become. I have to wonder if Harvey Weinstein puts something on his ass to make it taste like candy, because the Academy seems to love kissing it every year.

My Top 10 Films of 2011

OK, here we go with the list of my favorite films of the past year. If you haven’t read the pre-ramble I posted a couple of weeks ago, please read that first, then come back. Here we go:

10) The Muppets - this was the year’s biggest surprise for me, as I wasn’t even that psyched to see it and only wound up doing so because another movie was sold out. Director James Bobin and writers Jason Segel and Nicholas Stoller (Forgetting Sarah Marshall) have concocted a rather genius story in which the Muppets have been gone for 30 years (in reality, it’s been nowhere near that long) and have to reunite to save their old studio from being torn down. It’s a road movie, a “let’s get the band back together” movie and a musical comedy (imagine The Blues Brothers with felt) and all of it just works. Hilariously funny (I love the randomness of “80′s Robot”), sweet, sad and nostalgic in all the right ways, with a human cast that is totally game (especially Segel and Amy Adams). Even if you’re not a huge Muppet fan (I only have vague memories of watching The Muppet Show as a kid), it still works because the Muppets are a stand-in for our lost innocence. If you don’t tear up at least a little by the end of this, you truly have no heart. If parts of it seem a little awkward (Chris Cooper’s rap number, for instance – yikes), that somehow makes it all the more endearing. The Muppets is a movie of wide-eyed innocence, hope and dreams, and maybe we need that now more than ever. No wonder Fox News hates it. (Theatrical; on DVD March 20)

9) Tucker & Dale vs. Evil - and now for something completely different, this low-budget horror-comedy is one of the few that completely nails its targets and manages to be a hilarious experience in its own right. A wickedly funny satire of “survival horror” films (a subgenre which I’ve grown really tired of myself), Tucker & Dale gleefully destroys horror-movie stereotypes while still providing the splatter modern horror fans demand. Director/co-writer Eli Craig is a talent to watch, while Alan Tudyk and Tyler Labine are fantastic as the kind-hearted, bewildered title characters. One hopes to see them in more crazy adventures. In the meantime, I don’t think I’ll ever watch another “redneck horror” movie without thinking of Tucker & Dale. (Netflix streaming; also on DVD) (limited theatrical release 9/30/11)

8) Rubber - I can’t really explain writer-director Quentin Dupieux’s crazy movie or its presence on this list, except that it made me laugh myself silly more than any other film this year. An absurdist comedy about a homicidal tire with psychic powers whose every move is watched and criticized by an “audience” of random people (including 80′s B-movie icon Wings Hauser!), Rubber is either a bizarre satire of plot-driven cinema or a nutty excuse for utter weirdness. Either way, it’s damn funny stuff. We’re told at the beginning that there is “No Reason” for any of it, so anyone looking for deep meaning is just going to be puzzled. It either makes you laugh or it doesn’t, and it made me laugh quite a bit. As always, your mileage may vary. So to speak. (Netflix streaming; also on DVD) (limited theatrical release 4/1/11)

7) Stake Land - extremely impressive vampire horror film from director/co-writer Jim Mickle (Mulberry Street), who manages to create a convincing post-apocalyptic America with a relatively low budget. About as far away from Twilight as you can possibly get, this is dark stuff in which the vamps are feral beasts with a thirst for human blood (you know, vampires). There’s not much humor to be found here, and there’s a serious anti-Christian streak running through it (the villains are not just vampires but a group of religious-fanatic humans who believe the vamps are “doing God’s work”), so if that bothers you, consider yourself warned. But for this particular agnostic, this is the movie Red State should’ve been. At a time when the horror scene is full of remakes and sequels, original, well-made horror films like this are worth supporting. According to IMDb, this excellent piece of work was only shown on 5 screens total, with its opening weekend only showing on 1 screen. That’s both sad and ridiculous, but a lot of quality genre films don’t even get that much. (DVD) (limited theatrical release 4/29/11)

6) X-Men: First Class - yep, it’s a big blockbuster superhero movie and a prequel, and it was one of my favorite films of the year, one of only 2 films on this list that I saw twice. I thought director/co-writer Matthew Vaughn (Kick-Ass) and the excellent cast really pulled it off. First Class is surprisingly fun in the style of 60s-era Bond films, as well as a solid and convincing prequel to Bryan Singer’s X-Men movies (Ratner’s abomination of a third film doesn’t exist in my dojo). Kevin Bacon’s Sebastian Shaw is easily my favorite villain of the year, and there’s a terrific mix of fascinating characters here that I hope will be further explored in future films. I know this film has its share of haters, but I can’t imagine what more they could have possibly wanted from this. For once, Fox did something right, and I say let’s give them credit for it or they may not do it again. (twice theatrically; now on DVD)

5) A Better Life - I can’t imagine anyone hating director Chris Weitz’s sensitive, vivid film about a Mexican immigrant trying to provide for his son, but I’m sure some people will find a way. At a time when empathy seems to be a dirty word, we need more films like this; whatever happened to quality dramas about social issues? They seem to be few and far between these days. Borrowing a bit from The Bicycle Thief, A Better Life is a simple story about a decent man who loves his son, set in the real world. When’s the last time we had a movie like that released by a major studio? I can’t remember. Weitz thankfully doesn’t seem interested in political agendas or any of that; he’s simply showing us a chapter in the lives of two human beings and the world they live in. How that affects your point of view is up to you. Demain Bichir and Jose Julian are equally impressive as the father who wants his son to have more than he does, and the son who is just beginning to realize how much his father has sacrificed for him. If Bichir’s Oscar nomination motivates more people to see this film, I’m all for that; regardless, he’s absolutely worthy of the nod based on his powerful work here. Needless to say, if you hate minorities, immigrants and/or poor people, you’re probably going to hate this film, but maybe (just maybe) it will open your eyes to the reality of the situation. Weitz apparently used his cache with Summit from having directed the second Twilight movie to get this film made, and to that I say, very well done, sir. (DVD) (limited release 6/24/11)

4) Drive - yes, the film that’s on everyone else’s list is also on mine, and rightfully so. Nicolas Winding Refn’s powerhouse crime thriller was one of the best shock to the systems of the year, a potent reminder of how good a simple genre movie can be with the right director and cast involved. You can dismiss it as warmed-over 80′s Michael Mann if you want, or you can let yourself get sucked into its rhythms and appreciate the twisty plot and fine performances. Ryan Gosling was the year’s coolest hero as the expert stunt driver/wheelman who gets dragged into a major clusterfuck due to his crush on a neighbor (perfectly understandable, given that she’s played by the luminous Carey Mulligan). As fantastic as Albert Brooks is here as the local crime lord (who would have thought?), I was also impressed by Bryan Cranston, Ron Perlman and Christina Hendricks. For all its modern trappings (and excellent soundtrack), Drive is basically an old-fashioned noir, and a damn fine one at that. It’s one of those films you can’t help but enjoy the hell out of, and there’s no reason why you shouldn’t. (theatrical; now on DVD)

3) MIdnight in Paris - I know some people wish Woody Allen would just hang it up, and I think those people are just dead wrong. The proof is that he occasionally offers up a near-masterpiece like this one, a lush romantic comedy in which the object of desire is the city of Paris itself and all its charms. There’s a bit of time-travel involved as well as a wicked satire of nostalgia and those who wallow in it without realizing what the present offers. It helps a little if you know a bit about the city and famous writers and artists who lived there (Woody doesn’t wait for you to catch up), but it’s not an absolute requirement to understand the main character’s dilemma. Owen Wilson makes a surprisingly effective Woody stand-in, while Marion Cotillard is just as seductive as the city itself. And you have to love Adrien Brody as Picasso! Come on! I was surprised how well this did at the boxoffice (have we finally forgiven the Woodman?), but even if it made no money at all, Midnight in Paris would still be one of Woody’s best in recent years. (theatrical; now on DVD)

2) Insidious - I’ve already written at length about my admiration for James Wan’s horror flick (check the Archives under May 2011; holy crap, there are 180 comments! I didn’t realize that! Thanks for posting everyone! Well, except that one guy. He’s an idiot). I just wanted to reiterate that it is still one of the most exhilarating experiences I had at the movies last year. I haven’t watched it again since, but I want to do so soon. Whatever you think the ending means, the important thing is that the movie works like a motherfucker on your nerves. If you’re the kind of person who thinks a movie has to have blood and guts to be “True Horror”, then obviously you’re not going to like it. But if you’re willing to let it work on you (especially in a dark theater), then insidious is the scare-fest of the year. There’s now a sequel in the works, and I look forward to it. I just hope it doesn’t suck. That would be truly insidious. (theatrical; now on DVD and Netflix streaming)

And my favorite movie of the year is… (drumroll please)

1) Hugo - Martin Scorsese’s love letter to cinema. If I even have to explain why this is my favorite film of the year, then you either didn’t see it or didn’t understand it. I saw it twice in 3D and loved it equally both times. I could immerse myself in that experience over and over again without getting tired of it. Far more than a simple “family film” could ever be, Hugo is Scorsese at his finest, the kind of film I never really thought he would make but has proved himself more than capable of it. I don’t know what else to say, except that I loved this film and I love everything about it. There are no words adequate enough to properly cover how great this movie is. So I’ll just say, “Best Film I Saw Last Year”, and that should do it. What else is there to say? (twice theatrically; on DVD Feb. 28)

So that about does it. The 10 films that I loved the most from 2011. If there’s a title or two you haven’t seen on this list, I encourage you to seek them out and I hope you enjoy them as much as I did. You can post your own lists in the Comments section if you like, as well as any feedback you want to give. Unless you want to call me a “fuckin’ pussy” for being scared by insidious; that’s already been done. No need for redundancy here. Hope you enjoyed the list, and I look forward to all the films of 2012. Talk to you later.